Breakup Gifts & Care Packages

Breakup Rx funny breakup gifts for friends featuring Closure Capsules, Don’t Call Your Ex, and Emotional Cleanse Breakup Rx funny breakup gifts for friends featuring Closure Capsules, Don’t Call Your Ex, and Emotional Cleanse

💔 Breakup Rx™

Because getting over them requires an emotional prescription-strength intervention.

Common Symptoms:

Text draft regret

Location stalking

Rebound spirals

Haunting nostalgia

Green dot obsession

#NotaRealMD Note:

Take two and block their number

15 products
15 products
Rebound Refresher Rebound Refresher

Rebound Refresher

$23.95
$23.95
Text Your Ex Tabs Text Your Ex Tabs

Text Your Ex Tabs

$23.95
$23.95
Withdrawal Symptoms Withdrawal Symptoms

Withdrawal Symptoms

$23.95
$23.95

Post-breakup errors may include...

Don’t Call Your Ex breakup gift for no-contact chaos with candy, lime, and a cocktail Breakup Playlist Poisoner funny breakup gift for friends with candy and a playlist on Spotify in the car. Alt text: End Scene Edibles funny breakup gift with banana candy from Take Two & Text Me Text Your Ex Tabs funny breakup gift beside a phone showing a late-night text conversation with an ex Exorcism Bites funny breakup gift with candy, sage bundle, and cleansing setup

Two pillows between you and a bad decision.

View Rx

A playlist with a personal vendetta.

View Rx

Making a dramatic exit with absolute cinematic flair.

View Rx

Exercising poor judgment.

View Rx

Blocking that requires backup from the universe.

View Rx
Don’t Call Your Ex breakup gift for no-contact chaos with candy, lime, and a cocktail

Two pillows between you and a bad decision.

View Rx
Breakup Playlist Poisoner funny breakup gift for friends with candy and a playlist on Spotify in the car.

A playlist with a personal vendetta.

View Rx
Alt text: End Scene Edibles funny breakup gift with banana candy from Take Two & Text Me

Making a dramatic exit with absolute cinematic flair.

View Rx
Text Your Ex Tabs funny breakup gift beside a phone showing a late-night text conversation with an ex

Exercising poor judgment.

View Rx
Exorcism Bites funny breakup gift with candy, sage bundle, and cleansing setup

Blocking that requires backup from the universe.

View Rx

Other Scripts In the Med Cabinet

📱 Viral Symptom Rx™
🚨 Adulting Triage™
😈 After Hours™
👯 Best Friend Pharmacy™
💔 Breakup Rx™
❤️‍🩹 Emotional First Aid™
👨‍👧 Family Side Effects™
❤️ Love Symptoms™
🚩 Red Flag Rx™
🏢 Office Clinic™
🍎 Faculty Ward™
🎂 Signs of Aging™
  • Take Two & Text Me prescription icon
    Prescription-Inspired

    Parody labels made for real-life symptoms

  • Take Two & Text Me heart icon
    Sweet Dose Included

    Curated candy options selected to match each prescription

  • Take Two & Text Me gift box icon
    Gift-Ready

    Easy to send, gift, keep, or hand over dramatically

  • Take Two & Text Me not medicine icon
    Duh, Not Real Medicine

    Only fun, packaged emotional side effects support