Astrology Gifts for Every Zodiac Sign

✨ Zodiac Rx™

Pseudo-scientific logic for your planetary retrogrades and personality flaws.

Rx for:

Birth Chart Blame

Common Symptoms:

Mercury retrograde excuses

Rising-sign defensiveness

Personality flaws with proof

Emotional weather reports

Blaming the moon again

#NotaRealMD Note:

Take two and stop blaming Mercury

13 products
13 products
Aquarius Air Tabs Aquarius Air Tabs

Aquarius Air Tabs

$23.95
$23.95
Aries-nol Aries-nol

Aries-nol

$23.95
$23.95
Cancer Capsules Cancer Capsules

Cancer Capsules

$23.95
$23.95
Capricorn Crystals Capricorn Crystals

Capricorn Crystals

$23.95
$23.95
Emergency Gift Card (Digital E-Gift)

Emergency Gift Card (Digital E-Gift)

From $10.00
From $10.00
Gemini Gelcaps Gemini Gelcaps

Gemini Gelcaps

$23.95
$23.95
Leo Lozenges Leo Lozenges

Leo Lozenges

$23.95
$23.95
Libra Aid Libra Aid

Libra Aid

$23.95
$23.95
Pisces Patches Pisces Patches

Pisces Patches

$23.95
$23.95
Sagittarius Seltzer Sagittarius Seltzer

Sagittarius Seltzer

$23.95
$23.95
Scorpio Venom astrology gift for intense Scorpios with trust issues, suspicious minds, and revenge spirals. Scorpio Venom astrology gift for intense Scorpios with trust issues, suspicious minds, and revenge spirals.

Scorpio Venom

$23.95
$23.95
Taurus Tabs Taurus Tabs

Taurus Tabs

$23.95
$23.95

Showing 12 of 13 items

Other Scripts In the Med Cabinet

📱 Viral Symptom Rx™
🚨 Adulting Triage™
😈 After Hours™
👯 Best Friend Pharmacy™
💔 Breakup Rx™
❤️‍🩹 Emotional First Aid™
👨‍👧 Family Side Effects™
❤️ Love Symptoms™
🚩 Red Flag Rx™
🏢 Office Clinic™
🍎 Faculty Ward™
🎂 Signs of Aging™
  • Take Two & Text Me prescription icon
    Prescription-Inspired

    Parody labels made for real-life symptoms

  • Take Two & Text Me heart icon
    Sweet Dose Included

    Curated candy options selected to match each prescription

  • Take Two & Text Me gift box icon
    Gift-Ready

    Easy to send, gift, keep, or hand over dramatically

  • Take Two & Text Me not medicine icon
    Duh, Not Real Medicine

    Only fun, packaged emotional side effects support