{"product_id":"espresso-yourself-funny-adulting-gift","title":"Espresso Yourself","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEspresso Yourself\u003c\/strong\u003e is for the adult who treats espresso like a personality, a coping mechanism, and a questionable life strategy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eMade for unrealistic to-do lists, fast typing, faster spirals, and the deep belief that one more cup will fix absolutely everything.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePrescribed By:\u003c\/strong\u003e Dr. Cold Brew Chaos\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePatient:\u003c\/strong\u003e One More Cup\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDosage:\u003c\/strong\u003e Take when adulting needs jet fuel.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eRefills:\u003c\/strong\u003e Each time energy runs out.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eExpires:\u003c\/strong\u003e When sleep is optional.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDirections:\u003c\/strong\u003e Use with sarcasm, unrealistic to-do lists, and the belief that this cup will fix everything you’ve ever avoided.\n\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePerfect for funny coworker gifts, caffeine gifts, funny adulting gifts, work burnout gifts, and anyone powered by coffee and poor decisions.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eMay cause caffeine confidence.\u003c\/strong\u003e Side effects include fast typing and faster spirals.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNet Weight:\u003c\/strong\u003e 4.5 oz candy fill.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Take Two \u0026 Text Me","offers":[{"title":"Emergency Energy Tabs (Smarties Tablets)","offer_id":50756803723510,"sku":"AT-EY-SMT","price":23.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Caffeine Crash Cushion (Mike \u0026 Ike Original)","offer_id":50756803756278,"sku":"AT-EY-MIO","price":23.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso Yourself Beans (Teenee Beanee Jelly Beans)","offer_id":50756803789046,"sku":"AT-EY-TBJ","price":23.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chocolate Shot (Milk Chocolate M\u0026M's)","offer_id":51862073409782,"sku":"AT-EY-MNM","price":23.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0807\/8897\/9958\/files\/espresso-yourself-funny-gift-for-friends_00Front.jpg?v=1790989789","url":"https:\/\/taketwoandtextme.com\/products\/espresso-yourself-funny-adulting-gift","provider":"Take Two \u0026 Text Me","version":"1.0","type":"link"}