{"product_id":"breakdown-hotline","title":"Breakdown Hotline","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBreakdown Hotline™\u003c\/strong\u003e is a 24\/7 crisis remedy for the friend who answers the FaceTime call before your breakdown even finishes loading.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eMade for ugly cries, 3 AM emergency calls, low-key instability, and the friend who seamlessly transitions from listening to roasting to ordering you takeout.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePrescribed By:\u003c\/strong\u003e Dr. Breakdown Buddy\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePatient:\u003c\/strong\u003e Low-Key Unstable\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDosage:\u003c\/strong\u003e One per ugly cry. FaceTime required.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eRefills:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unlimited 24\/7 hotline access\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eExpires:\u003c\/strong\u003e When FaceTime turns into a 2 AM sleepover.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDirections:\u003c\/strong\u003e Use when you can’t tell if it’s a breakdown or just Tuesday.\n\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePerfect for funny mental health gifts, best friend survival kits, tough love gifts, adult gag gifts, and friends with absolutely no filter.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eMay trigger ugly crying.\u003c\/strong\u003e Includes puffy eyes, raw truth, and sleepover requests.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNet Weight:\u003c\/strong\u003e 4.5 oz candy fill.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Take Two \u0026 Text Me","offers":[{"title":"Crisis Call Mix (Mike \u0026 Ike Original)","offer_id":50764928549110,"sku":"BFP-EDH-MIO","price":23.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hotline Hearts (Rainbow Hearts)","offer_id":50869029011702,"sku":"BFP-EDH-RHT","price":23.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Meltdown Backup (Smarties Tablets)","offer_id":50869029044470,"sku":"BFP-EDH-SMT","price":23.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0807\/8897\/9958\/files\/BestFriendPharmacy_05_Front.jpg?v=1788837710","url":"https:\/\/taketwoandtextme.com\/products\/breakdown-hotline","provider":"Take Two \u0026 Text Me™","version":"1.0","type":"link"}