{"product_id":"assembly-buffer","title":"Assembly Buffer","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eAssembly Buffer™\u003c\/strong\u003e is for surviving student sit-down chaos.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eMade to take before 60 minutes of clapping and shushing, only if it’s “mandatory,” and when the mic cuts.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePrescribed By:\u003c\/strong\u003e Dr. Bleachers\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePatient:\u003c\/strong\u003e Counting Heads\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDosage:\u003c\/strong\u003e Take before 60 minutes of clapping and shushing.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eRefills:\u003c\/strong\u003e Only if it’s “mandatory”\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eExpires:\u003c\/strong\u003e When the mic cuts out again\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDirections:\u003c\/strong\u003e Use when you wish you were back in staff duty.\n\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePerfect for classroom survival, funny school assembly gifts, funny teacher gifts, school staff gifts, and school administrator gag gifts.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCrowd-induced eye strain likely.\u003c\/strong\u003e Side effects include row patrol flashbacks.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNet Weight:\u003c\/strong\u003e 4.5 oz candy fill.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Take Two \u0026 Text Me","offers":[{"title":"Bleacher Survival Bites (Mike And Ike Mega Mix)","offer_id":50756774985974,"sku":"FW-AEP-MIO","price":23.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Shush Support (Gumballs Mini Double Bubble)","offer_id":50756775018742,"sku":"FW-AEP-GMD","price":23.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Exit Strategy Jawbreakers (Mini Jawbreakers)","offer_id":50756775051510,"sku":"FW-AEP-MJB","price":23.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0807\/8897\/9958\/files\/FacultyWard_02_Front.jpg?v=1788889269","url":"https:\/\/taketwoandtextme.com\/products\/assembly-buffer","provider":"Take Two \u0026 Text Me™","version":"1.0","type":"link"}